When Scarlet was still on the inside my husband and I discussed the pros and
cons of me returning to work. Daycare is unfairly expensive and we decided to
pass, I was going be a stay at home mom. I have not been without a job since I
was 16, this was exciting and new but also taking me out of my comfort zone. My
job was always part of my identity, actually a big part wether I liked it or not. So I
began to take on my new identity as a stay at home mom or “homemaker” as our
government would say. I started to learn from my mother and mother-in-law how
to cook, and I found that I liked baking a lot more than I liked cooking. After a
while I realized I needed to shift my focus back to cooking meals because baking
was providing my family with too many tempting sugary sweets. I began to find
that simple things like making the beds in the morning was necessary and even
though we may not be leaving the house getting myself and the kids dressed out
of pyjamas and hair brushed was also necessary. On top of this my runs became
crucial. The morning workouts get our day started and give me a sense of
purpose. Aside from loving my kids to death and being a supportive mom, I also
feel the need to do something for myself which increases my patience throughout
the day and keeps me clear minded.
In the summer I tried getting my workouts done before the kids woke up, I was
doing this for me and for them. I felt bad that my runs were getting longer and
they were not receiving my immediate attention for 1+ hours. My husband and I
tried hard to make this work, but I just couldn’t wake up early enough which I
found extremely frustrating. If I got up at 4am one of the kids would get up at
4:30am looking for me and when I was not there my husband would have to get
up with them. Justin was a trooper for a bit but eventually it became too much.
The kids needed to get more sleep and that wasn’t going to happen if mom
wasn’t able to come in and sleep beside them the wee hours of the morning
unfortunately.

Life can get in the way- being a stay at home mom has been a privilege and
given me a huge opportunity to progress with my running. At the end of the day
you need time…a lot of time days months years to slowly increase endurance
and mileage. For myself and other distance runners the workout cannot usually
be completed in an hour. I have tried working out at different times in the day,
afternoon/night is not ideal for me I find that I become sluggish after eating all
day and the liquids in my body at that point make it very difficult run more than
half an hour without being interrupted by bathroom breaks.
Speaking of bathroom breaks, a very nagging issue I deal with as a runner and
as a result of having children is bladder leakage. The saying “you don’t know
what you’ve got until its gone” holds true. Before I had children I never saw just
how good I had it. I would be able to run, or go for long periods of time without
having to use the bathroom. I could sneeze without having to grab my crotch
trying to stop the free flow. Oh, is it too late to mention that this may contain
some content readers particularly of the male gender may find disturbing? Well,

you’ve now been warned. Sneezing is just one example. I also lose control when
I laugh, or if I consume more than one alcoholic beverage. I have only noticed
this affect with the alcohol recently as I was not drinking while breastfeeding or
during pregnancies. I have had a couple nights where my husband and I went
out and let loose a little and it gets so bad that just the motion of standing up from
my chair to go to the bathroom makes me prematurely go…just so not something
you generally would want to share with others. After having two children and
having doctors, residents and even my husband seeing my body in ways no one
should ever have to see, I don’t have much shame. This bladder issue of course,
causes problems within my workout routines as well. At first, I had NO control
when I would attempt to do jumprope. I would leave this exercise to the end of
my workout program for this reason alone, I wanted to skip because its great for
cardio but I knew I was probably going to need to shower right after. Even if I
would wee before starting more would come out, so I would go to the bathroom
again, and still more would come out. WHERE IS IT COMING FROM! So
frustrating. I also run into a similar issue when I am running, anytime I workout
after I have had anything to drink that day I just pee my pants. The interesting
part is that it doesn’t just happen all at once, it just slowly leaks out over the
duration of my run. Even if I stop and use the bathroom every half hour or so, I
still end up being soaked…so gross I know. So in conclusion, I find if I can
workout in the morning before I have had anything to drink I can get through a
two hour workout without any accidents. This will pose a problem for me however
on race days as the races do not start until around 10am, so I will need to eat a
little and hydrate a beforehand. I have decided I need some kind of adult diaper.
My husband has a hard time thinking about me wearing Lulu lemons on race day
over top of a big diaper haha! So we shall see when the time comes, until then I
will continue to go with the flow…no pun intended 😉
Anyone else with similar issues have advise for me on race day?

Gym Memberships- I was a member at the YMCA for about two years. The
membership was given to me for free while I was working in administration for
the child care department. I enjoyed this at the time because I did not have my
children yet and I would head to the gym before or after work. There were many
workout classes available but I always stuck to the treadmill and created my own
little weight lifting routine. I think a gym membership is great if you like the
environment and especially if you enjoy the classes offered. For me, its always
been about convenience and availability. There is nothing more convenient about
being able to wake up, throw up the hair, not worry about if your outfit matches or
if you still have sleep in your eyes and hit the treadmill or head outside. This is
why having a treadmill at home has been a crucial part of my running successes.
Before I had children I would get up early to have my run done before work. I
really enjoy waking up early. When it is still dark outside and the stars are just
starting to dwindle, its a peaceful time and it makes me feel I am getting a head

start before everyone else. There are pros and cons of course, in the winter its
damn cold and it can be difficult to get out of your warm bed and go directly into
the freezer. In the summer there are skunks and as of more recently this area as
queried quite a few coyotes that like to roam around at dawn. I always have to be
on the lookout because I am quite the chicken when it comes to wildlife. Of
course aside from animals being alone during quiet times I am always trying to
stay alert or my surroundings. I try to make sure I am not being followed and to
do my best to stay in well lit areas. I have been frightened a few times, once I
thought I was being followed when I had just started my run at about 4:30am. I
cannot say for sure as nothing ever escalated, thank goodness. The person
eventually stopped circling so I will never know but it definitely made me feel
uncomfortable and very vulnerable. My husband gave me an alarm I can pull the
switch on and its a very high pitch sound which would hopefully draw attention
but I just hate how scary it is to feel vulnerable lie that. I carried pepper spray
when I would run through paths in the park but that still never made me feel
100% confident I would be able to take down my opponent. So my dilemma is, I
am still unsure if I should be running outside alone in the dark even if its first
thing in the morning or if I should give it up completely. I love the freedom,
peacefulness, and calm in the air it makes the run not feel so much like a chore. I
think its a very important yet difficult decision that I have not come to terms with
yet.
My husband recently purchased a bike so that he and I can go out together on
weekends when we have family available to spend some time with our children.
This of course, is much safer. We get to spend some time together, and have
uninterrupted discussions about things going on in our lives that we don’t usually
get to do with the hustle and bustle of our daily routines. Now all I have to do is
see if I can get him up at the crack of dawn in the summer months to get him to
see and feel what I feel. I am sure he will become addicted too…oh I’m forgetting
one thing our babies! Well my sister is awesome and she loves spending lots of
time with us on weekends so she would be the 3rd part to the equation just need
to get her on board. Now, all of a sudden my quick early morning run has turned
into a three person challenge making it less attainable it will not be something I
will be able to do all the time so I have to be okay with my backup plans aka the
treadmill or maybe running later in the day.

I’ve always been competitive. I played competitive soccer for years and ended
that career after a few too many injuries which put me out of the game for too
long. I was also getting married and did not want to be hobbling down the isle.
My husband supports everything I want to do and I am very grateful for this but
we are also reasonable and logistic people, we knew we wanted to have children
and so after we the wedding madness was over I did not return to the sport. I had
decided to focus on running in the meantime while we worked on this next

chapter of our lives.
Running: The runners high is real and it is addictive. I realized this a long time
ago and sometimes this becomes a love hate relationship. Sometimes I wish I
could wake up and not have running on my mind, or maybe I could cut myself
some slack every once and a while. There is a deep craving for that sensation
one gets when completing a run, midway through a run, or at dinner time 6 hours
after the run where your body feels complete. I think clearer after a run, I make
better food choices, and my stress levels are significantly reduced. After
introducing the circuit to my weekly regime I realized I would be proud if myself
for completing the workout but still does not provide me with the same
satisfaction as a solid run would. Is it because I believe I burn more calories
when I run or is it because I am not getting the “runners high”?
My husband recently has decided he wants to run. Nothing too serious to start
but when he gets home from work he heads downstairs to do about 5k. He is
already in good shape so his first time trying it only took him 27 minutes. We
were having dinner the other night and he was feeling so good he told me he
thought he was experiencing the runners high and how amazing it felt.